Marriage

God's design and calling for you as a wife
This material appears courtesy of Covenant Keepers

Be a prudent wife
Solomon declared that "Houses and riches are an inheritance from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord" (Prov. 19:14). What does it mean to be a prudent wife? The word prudent means one who is wise and understanding. Fathers give the gift of an inheritance in material wealth, but when God desires to give a gift of real worth, He gives a wise and understanding wife. Notice again, a wife is portrayed in Scripture far from being worthless, but compared to the greatest inheritance that could be given by man.

Also, it is interesting that God commands husbands to dwell with their spouses "with understanding, giving honor to the wife as to the weaker vessel" (1 Peter 3:7). But, notice in the previous passage in Proverbs that you are required to be understanding too. These two verses balance each other and encourage both spouses to give one of the most essential qualities for a good marriage; understanding.

Therefore, if God wants you to understand your husband, how do you gain this insight? So often men express to me that their wives don't understand them. How about you, do you understand your husband's needs, his weaknesses, and his strengths? This understanding is what will enable you to be a strong and effective helper and the counterpart your husband needs.

What are some of the possible needs your husband might have, and how would you determine them? The best way to find out what his needs might be is to simply ask him. Why not ask him, "Where can I better meet your needs? Where do I need a greater understanding of you and the pressures you face?" When you ask these kinds of questions, you are immediately bridging the gap between the real differences that exist between you and your spouse.

Men and women differ radically in their make up. You are physically and hormonally different; you communicate differently; you have distinct social and sexual needs; and you both express love very differently. With all these differences you need lots of understanding of the man you married. As you gain this understanding of him you will naturally be brought closer to one another. If you reverse the process and insist on your way all the time, you only make the differences more apparent and widen the gap between you. Therefore, seek to understand your husband and what his real needs are, be willing to give to meet these needs; this is God's design for your marriage.

• Be a helper
  
• Be a virtuous wife
  
• Be a submissive wife
  
• Be a companion